Early days of #bitcoin-otc

I was active on #bitcoin-otc in early 2009. An inner voice told me 1500 BTC would be enough to live my dreams. Instead I asked for 2500 BTC for $25 and got kicked out of the channel. At the time that amount was only worth a couple dollars, so I felt rejected by the community.
Around the same period I also mined 50 BTC. I wrote the private key on paper, then tore it up because the software wasn’t working right and I figured it “wasn’t meant to be.” I never tried to recover it.
I’ve spent years stuck in the loop of “I could have been rich.” I can’t fully accept that I missed what felt like a once-in-a-lifetime chance. Even the 50 BTC would have changed everything for me.
I’m trying to make peace with it and stay grateful for what I have now. Thanks for listening.